After forgetting myself and asking to die on Monday a lot has happened. Now it's Friday and surprise! I'm getting discharged home. I even took 30 percent of my bendamustine dose last evening so this cycle wasn't lost. Cycle 1 I was given 60 percent of the dose. We tried 90 percent of the dose on Mon, but all hell broke loose. If I didn't receive another dose this week I would have needed to come back in two weeks for a full second cycle. Now my next full chemo cycle will be May 9th, after a PET scan May 4th. It turns out I had a "bacteremic event" that caused my pain and confusion from having my nephrostomy tube removed Monday morning. Bacteria accumulated on the tube when it was removed the bacteria went to my blood. Later that night in the ER one blood culture came back positive but is likely a contaminant. I've been able to move around, talk, shower, make jewelry since then. I'm happy to be headed home. I awoke last night to the song, "don't stop believing, just hold on to that feelin'..." Singing in my head. I pray I recover. I'm looking forward to more family time, maybe a trip to NYC (mooching off mom) and seeing friends, but mostly I can't wait to snuggle up, watching movies and napping with the fam.