Fight Like a Girl

***DISCLAIMER: THIS PICTURE WAS NOT DRAWN BY MY SON*******
The other day, while playing soccer with X, he told me I “kicked like a boy.”
Oh, no. That child did NOT just say that. He’s got a little bit of his momma in him.
Along the lines of other funny X stories, he thinks the Christina Aguilera song “It keeps Getting Better” belongs to me. Every time he hears the song, anywhere, he thinks it is because I put it there.
Unfortunately, this song has familiarized him with the word “bitch.”
This word is mean and it has become far too commonplace in the media. I don’t want my son saying this.
We spoke with him and told him to use the word “witch” as a replacement.
In the car, when the song came on, he told me the bad word was too strong to resist. It was taking over his mouth!
I told him to work it out and if he didn’t he was paying the “swear shell.”
The swear shell is a shell we give money too when we say a bad word.
I hate the swear shell. It was obviously not my idea, and it’s always stealing my money!
Then on Weds., as we were leaving DHMC, he walked straight up to a woman and told her “I voted for Obama.”
What?! You’re five, but I didn’t stop him. He went on to ask her who she voted for.
She told him she voted for Obama as well.
Then X proceeded to tell her he liked Obama’s “health care plan.”
Yes. My child is rockstar and don’t you forget it!
Remember, if you have a child like mine or the one that drew the picture on the right, be sure to review their homework. This one is special for you Brynn, and to all the teachers out there.
Stories aside, fight and take no prisoners people. GI Jane it.
I’m starting Cancerocracy. Who wants to join me? My guess is a lot of people are all ready in the club. Patients, survivors, co-survivors, doctors, nurses, social workers, you are all already in the club.
You’re in and you didn’t even know it.
Maybe you think you know what I’m talking about but have no idea? I’ll school you. We all will.
If this fails, just take a look at yourself and Fight Like a Girl!